How long?

I wrote this poem.  Sometimes it’s so hard to bear watching my mom go downhill everyday. So it helps me to write and share with all of you.  Today I’m raising money for Alzheimer’s called the Longest day!  Everyone can help a little.  I hope my blog helps someone out there who is facing this too.  Know that you are not alone!  Have a wonderful day!😀🌼

How long

Will you remember me?

How long will it be?

I do not know!

I only know that

I love you!

No matter what!

You are my mother

And you will

Always be!

How long

Is it going to be

Before everything changes?

I don’t even want to think

About it!

But I know I have to

Face it somehow!

But how long?

Copyright: Reflections of Love/CD😀🌼

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Goodbye

I wrote this poem.  I started this blog because of my mom having dementia and Alzheimer’s and a great deal of my family has it too.  My mom is struggling right now and she has a great deal of challenges.   It helps me to write and share with all of you.  Have a great day!

How can I say goodbye

After all these years

And tears!

It’s so hard to understand

What your going through!

I love you so much mom

I would give anything to feel

Your touch again!

But if the Lord decides

He wants you

There will be nothing

That I can do!

I know it will end

Your pain!

And set you free!

But you won’t be

With me!

I will miss you

So much!

But I know I

Will feel your touch again

Sometime, somewhere!🌼😀

Copyright: Reflections of Love/CD

 

Mom

I hope you are enjoying these posts as much as I like writing them.  I hope you all have a great weekend!  Enjoy the Fall weather.  I am trying my very best.

Today I went to visit my mom and dad and I have always enoyed going over there to see them.  Now since my mom has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease it’s not as fun anymore.  In fact it’s a little depressing for me. My mom just isn’t the same and it breaks my heart in two.  I try and be strong for my dad but inside I want to scream, cry and yell at the top of my lungs.

I miss her so much and I really miss all the good and special times that we shared together.  Now I just spend the day with the television on and I watch my mom fall in and out of consciousness.  It is very difficult to watch someone that you love go so down hill so very fast.  She once held a job, drove herself around and she always cooked and cleaned and took care of her family.  She really taught me everything I know through watching her all these years.  Now all we can do is watch her struggle.

This disease just takes everything that you have and it rips you apart.  It’s so hard to watch this take place especially when it’s someone who has been with you your whole life.  Its very devastating on you and your entire family.  My brother hasn’t seen my mom in a few months so he better prepare himself for what he is going to see. I know it’s going to be hard for him too.  He will be coming to visit on Thanksgiving.  I only have one brother.

It’s like she’s totally different not just in one way but in many.  I almost don’t want to see her because it’s so extremely difficult to take it all in.  My poor dad is so very patient with her and he is very sick most of the time too.  God bless him! My mom and dad have been married for 57 years and that’s a real accomplishment in today’s society.  I just got to take one day at a time I guess and hope and pray for the best.  That’s all I can really do.  I just hope someday they find a cure for this terrible disease.

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Guilt

I’m titling this post guilt ! Because when you have a family member that has dementia or Alzheimer’s you can feel guilty because you feel helpless when you know how much this person struggles. You also might feel like you don’t know if you are  doing enough for them. You want to be there for them as much as possible but sometimes you just can’t.  You are always thinking about them and how they are doing because you love them so much . It’s very hard sometimes to know how much to do for them .  Sometimes it feels like  you just want the time to stop so you can catch up with them. You might need more family to help out sometimes so you don’t become burned out and take a break every once in a while so you can cope in a better way. This can really help you better because you are doing something different and it helps you take your mind off of them for a while.  It’s good to do something fun maybe if it’s going for a walk in your favorite store or buying yourself a ice cream cone. Anything that gets you away for a while.